The thing about being conscious about figuring out a “plan for success” for getting through this final stage of my setback is that I can revise my first thoughts on a plan once I start working on my plan.
This is true any time that one is conscious about figuring out strategy.
The first thoughts are often not the ones that are the best!
That seems obvious now that I write it.
However, it was not obvious to me when I wrote my last post.
It took some reflection on my part this week for me to get to the place that it is obvious.
In the last blog post I wrote about what I imagine my strategy for the home stretch of this setback ought to be. As I wrote the post, I remembered that my strategy had to include “holding back my inner over achiever” because I have come to learn that pushing hard to the finish line doesn’t work for me after my brain injury.
This week I reflected on what the rest of my strategy ought to be.
As I thought about what I had written in my post, it struck me that I was still trying to do things like the old me did things.
It struck me that just imaging the race as a horse race was my old me.
And, I laughed and laughed gently with myself when I realized that my imagination was from a place in my old me.
I am not my old me!
They say that old habit die hard.
Certainly this old habit of imaging strategies as if I were the old me, is still with me.
How funny. After 17 years of recovery from my concussion, no less!
And then I reminded myself that the new me is the turtle in the race with the hare from the Aesop fables. In the fable, the hare challenges the turtle to the race and the turtle wins.
“Slow and steady wins the race” is the motto for the turtle in that race.
I have learned that the new me does better trying to emulate the turtle (and not the hare).
That means that I am already holding back “my inner over-achiever” during the race and the home stretch should be no different.
So what are other components for a better strategy for the Home Stretch.
(#1 Remember, I am a turtle in the race.
Keep holding back my inner over achiever because I cannot push throw this)
#2 Build my support network for the last stretch (if its not already built).
A friend called yesterday and at the end of the call, she said, add me to the list of people to call on for help.
#3 Prioritize safety first.
Don’t do things that if they don’t go as expected, may make things worse. Right now I am having some changes in my depth perception. So I am not driving until it is safe for me to drive. This means finding other drivers and changing some of my sons commitments. Its not easy to change this routine, but if I am an unsafe driver right now, then I need to prioritize safety first for me and my family.
#4 Be gentle with myself.
#5 Slow down (further to incorporate the whole strategy)!
Since I am not processing information well and making more mistakes than usual, in addition to imaging being the turtle in the race, I need to go at a turtle pace with my support network in place and prioritizes safety and is gentle for me and is slow enough that each step is the best step I can take be it forward or sometimes backward to go forward.
What are strategies that you use to build your support network around a setback?
How do they work for you?
How do you manage slowing down and finding the right pace for you?
What is the hardest thing about slowing down and holding back your inner over achiever?